Auntie Keeps Going
She can't stand
nor hold a cup
nor catch a thought
nor tell a tale
nor stage a complaint
with the old fervour
but she can parrot back
if you feed her right.
Dr Raj says she's free
from pain as he prescribes
more liquid oblivion.
It could be years
he cautions kindly.
Better pain-free
than compos mentis
and suffering.
The nurses say she's good.
Complies. Complies.
Who knows who she is now,
what colours haunt her sleep
what arguments she makes
inside her shell?
The nurses change the days,
they wheel her in and out
of weeks, they soothe her
with song and chocolate
they cook the sheets
they bleach the sorrow
they cube small the meat
they hunt for sores
they keep her
mildly clean, dispense, dispense
they check her pulse for rust
and oil her like an engine,
sputter, sigh and leak.
She's sleeping iron. Grit.
Who knows how she dreams,
what she lacks, what she lives for?
I know you remember me
she tells me on the phone.
I think of you every day
I lie.
I think of you every day
she lies back.
Jacqueline Saphra